I hardly feel as though I recognize myself anymore.
When my car is set to cruise control there is a little button that you can press to cancel the cruise speed and very, very gradually the car just starts slowing down. That's how I feel.
I can't really believe that I went back there tonight, after all this time. But I felt like I needed to go. Something inside me, deep down in my gut, was telling me to go there, and who was I to argue? So I drove forty minutes out of my way for what? Nothing. No dramatic finale, no sensible conclusion. Plain old, boring, nothing. I never even stepped foot of my car. Hell, I never put my car in park. It was so crowded there, I just kept on driving. I turned around and came home, feeling empty and rather underwhelmed. What a disappointment that was. Then again, the full moon is strikingly large tonight.
I've decided that when I write my biography it will be titled "Pick Up Your God Damn Feet When You're Walking" And Other Important Things My Father Taught Me. And it will be a tragedy.
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